What Hurts the Most
by ShadowDragon-24
Summary: Songfic to Rascal Flatt's 'What Hurts The Most' It's been two years since Ed had last heard her voice. It's been two years since he's seen her smile. It's been two agonizing years...two years of being alone and depressed...until now. EdWin COMPLETE!
1. What Hurts The Most

_**What Hurts the Most**_

**Disclaimer: **I Don't Own _FMA _In Any Way.

**Rating: **PG—PG-13 Due To Some Angst and Crude Language.

**A/N: **This is a song-fic to Rascal Flatt's song_ 'What Hurts the Most.' _When I first heard it, I fell in love with it and, not long after, I got an idea for a story for it :) so, without any further a due, I hope you like this story.

F----------------M----------------A

_I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house  
That don't bother me  
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out  
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while  
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me  
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok  
But that's not what gets me_

Edward Elric, now eighteen years of age, stared out of the window of his home as rain could be seen and heard in front and all around him. It wasn't as much a light rain as much as a great downpour from the heavens, with thunder roaring and lighting brightening up the entire sky, if only for a moment, before fading back into darkness. The elder Elric had returned from his job as a major in Central's headquarters several minutes ago, before the rain had come with big, grey clouds full of water. Aside from the sounds of pelting rain, his home was silent; only a stray creak every now and then could be heard escaping from who knows where. Alphonse, Edward's younger brother, was off to Lior to help out a bit.

The younger had asked his brother to come along but Ed's current job kept him from doing so. It's been approximately two years since the younger left before coming for a visit one day and tearing Edward's world apart by saying that he would have to stay there for a long while, to Ed's great dismay. The elder Alchemist had been quite lonely within his home without his younger brother as company. Not to mention, he didn't speak to Winry anymore after he told her that he would be joining the military once again after his quest to get Al's body back, which he did. Winry was very upset the day he told her, saying she felt it was better if he just never came back to her.

Ed tried explaining that he would still visit for more than just Automail upgrades and tune-ups but Winry didn't want to hear it. It was then that the silence between them came and Ed, soon after, packed his things and moved to Central with Alphonse. He had not even called Winry once within these two years and she had not called him. His Automail was still functioning properly; therefore, there was no real need for him to visit her. Aside from that fact that he had grown slightly taller, there just _wasn't_ enough reason to go and get new limbs.

Sadly, however, those exact metallic limbs that allowed him to walk and hold things was what caused him much grief in the past two years, or his entire life, to be more precise. The Automail were_ Winry's_ creations and that, alone, made Ed think about her all too much. Lately, it seemed that his Automail just stood out more than anything else. Whenever something was about to fall, it was always seemed to be to the Elric's right side and his quick reflexes would allow him to catch whatever was falling with his _right arm. _The sound of metal gently clinging and clanging reminded him of Winry shuffling through his arm or her toolbox.

As for his leg, the simple mismatched sound of his feet whenever he walked barefoot within his home was enough to make him think of the blonde mechanic. These thoughts haunted him in more ways than one; even staff at the office had noticed his change in behavior. Edward had taken to becoming unusually slow when his train of thought was heading straight toward Winry. When he got off said train, anybody talking to him would have to repeat themselves. The Elric had also taken to becoming quite sluggish at his work; the inbox at his desk seemed to grow more each day, seeing as the bottom of the stack were older files that he hadn't yet reached and probably wouldn't reach anytime soon.

Now, Edward wasn't one to let his tears flow so easily…when people were around, that is. Now that Ed had been alone in his house, he had found it easier to shed a few tears every once in a while and just let it out. It was difficult for him to force his tears aside for so long and, although it didn't solve much, he felt somewhat better after having a few tears flow. With both his younger brother and his best friend gone, he was left far too upset to hold it in. He still heard Al's voice and saw him because the younger would call him to check in and even visited every so often.

He was not so fortunate with Winry, however. He hadn't heard her voice for two years now, but he couldn't let her sweet sound escape from his mind. Sadly, he was not able to see her beautiful form neither. This suddenly made him wonder how much she had changed since he had last seen her smiling face. He had no pictures of her, so he was forced to keep only bittersweet memories of her and have a permanent_ mental_ picture of her.

_What hurts the most  
Was being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away  
And never knowing  
What could have been  
And not seeing that__ loving you  
Is what I was trying to do. _

The closest he had ever been to having Winry happy was when he came back for tune-ups, letting her know that he was at least alive and breathing. When he finally returned home with Alphonse in his rightful body and saying that their quest was over, he _knew _Winry was truly happy. She laughed and smiled more often, and had cried the tears of joy he had promised her so long ago. He was so close and it was when he had so very much to say to her. Even now, there were things he wanted to say to her.

Technically, _he_ was the one who chose to walk away but knowing that _she_ disapproved of his leaving and work made it feel like it was the other way around. She walked away from him by saying that she never wanted him around her anymore. The moment those words had escaped her lips was the moment he died a little inside. She had never said something like that to him before; she usually just insulted him, whacked him with her wrench and left with tears running down her cerulean eyes. She wouldn't tell him to stay away.

He'd been haunted everyday with the memory of when he told her he was joining the military once more. Reliving those moments so much, however, made him realize just exactly what it was that he had given up. Although he tried to ignore it, there was always that depressing question in the back of his head:_ What could've been?_

What would've happened between them if he had stayed? Would they still be 'just friends' or something deeper? What would've happened if he had told her his feelings towards her instead saying that he was rejoining the military? Although he could barely admit it to himself, Edward desperately wanted the answers to these questions. The day he told her he was leaving was another thing added to his list of biggest mistakes.

It was simple; he loved her. He didn't know when or how, but he fell in love with that beautiful, blonde and blue-eyed Automail junkie. He even recalled himself calling her 'cute' when he was younger. It was usually a thought concealed to his mind alone but it was something. She was cute with her antics but who was the Elric fooling?

She was more than just cute; she was beautiful, intelligent and sweet. Not to mention, her strength and independence was what Ed truly found so amazing about her. She didn't let people boss her around and, if they tried, she would just show her strength and tell them off or hit them with her infamous wrench. She tried her hardest to not let people bring her down. The only person that seemed to do that was Ed.

He never let her into his life. Winry never knew where the hell he was or if he was even alive and well. Not to mention, the fact that he only came when his Automail was busted didn't help much either. It only made the Rockbell worry and wonder what in the world had caused the metal to be destroyed in such a manner. Again, since Ed never told her, she never knew.

_It's hard to deal with the pain of losing __you everywhere I go  
But I'm doing It  
It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone  
Still Harder  
Getting up, getting dressed, living with this regret  
But I know if I could do it over_

_I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart  
That I left unspoken_

It was difficult to deal with this pain wherever he went. It seemed everything reminded him of that blonde young woman, making it difficult to focus on other things. People at the office weren't making much easier neither. Some had already suspected the situation between him and Winry while others assumed or pestered him for answers. Roy Mustang had even taking to asking him if Winry was doing alright, at least once a week.

He would usually glare or hiss out an angry and annoyed response like 'get a life and stay out of mine' or 'none of your damn business.' It was, however, difficult for him to smile whenever the subject was about something else and deal with the pain. He was struggling but he was doing it. He was a strong person but there was only so much that his broken heart could handle. Getting up every morning had become more of a drag than usual, considering he wasn't a morning person.

Getting dressed sometimes took more time than he'd like, causing him to be late to work. His usual excuse was that he slept in by accident or that he forgot to set his clock the night before. Living with that regret everyday of his life made things very difficult for him, including his usual habits and responsibilities. He knew that if he could just turn time back, he would redo many things. But, if he had to choose one…it would most likely be what he had told Winry two years ago; he would replace 'I'm going back to the military' with 'I love you.'

_What hurts the most  
Is being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away  
And never knowing  
What could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was trying to do_

So much regret so much pain and sadness…any other person probably would've killed themselves at this point or died of their own depression. Edward was stronger than that, however. His pain could consume him, eat away at his already-tortured soul until he was nothing but a pathetic shell of his former self but he wouldn't allow it. He had lived through all his years with much grief and it only made him stronger; it made him exactly who he was. Without all the turmoil in his life, he probably wouldn't have ended up as strong a person he was now.

He had seen The Gate at the mere age of eleven and it took away his leg at that time. Then, to save his poor brother's soul, he sacrificed his right arm. Only a year later, he was the true definition of a 'Human Weapon' and a 'Child Prodigy.' How ever many titles people gave him, it did not matter; nothing could take away the pain that he had caused to the ones close to him, especially Winry. No one deserved what he had done to her over the years and he knew _she _much less didn't deserve it.

_What hurts the most  
Was__ being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away  
And never knowing  
What could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was trying to do_

Edward sighed quietly to himself as thunder roared loudly in the distance, proudly claiming its dominion over the land. The Alchemist looked to the kitchen table beside him; a small stack of letters and promotional ads lay upon the wooden table. After staring at the rain for such a while, he finally reached over and took the stack in his left hand and then brought them down to his lap. Crossing one military pant-covered leg over the other, he began looking at each paper.

As he suspected, a few were notices for the bills he soon had to pay while others were ads for nearby shops and stores. Truly, nothing of great interest; he always paid his bills on time and he didn't give much thought to ads. He tossed his mail, gently, back on the table before looking back outside to the window, just as a scene was unfolding across the street. The Elric's eyebrows tensed slightly and he feared for the victim of the soon-to-be situation.

A young woman with blonde hair was struggling to get home under the terrible downpour but refused to run, as she was holding some bags in her arms; bags for of groceries or supplies, Ed figured. Behind the woman, however, was an odd, much elder fellow wearing dark clothing and with menacing dark eyes. Edward stood up; he couldn't stand on the sidelines and witness this without trying to stop it. If he didn't, an innocent life could be lost. He kept staring for a few moments, praying to the God he didn't believe in that what he was assuming wasn't really going to happen.

Sadly, however, once the young woman was close to an alleyway, the shady man quickened his pace up to her before forcing her into said alleyway. It was that moment that Ed lost it. He ran towards his front door and quickly opened it before exiting his home, slamming the door behind him, and running towards the alleyway. Once he reached it, he slid to a stop and immediately glared; the man had already pinned the young woman, by her wrists, to the wall at the end of the alley. The tension could clearly be seen in Ed's golden eyes.

"Let her go!" he demanded. He could not see the victims face because the man was preventing it. The man, of which, perked his head up and looked over his shoulder to who was ordering him. He raised a curious brow as he forced the young woman to the ground, of which fell with a slight gasp and yelp. With her back facing him, Ed could already tell that the man had ripped part of her shirt to the young woman's right shoulder.

"Who the hell do you think you are?" the man questioned in a deep, husky voice.

"_I'm_ a State Alchemist," Edward stated as he pulled out his watch momentarily before putting it away once more. "And _you're _under arrest for sexual harassment!"

"Ha!" the man mocked terribly. "You think one little dog of the state is gonna stop me?"

"Who the hell you calling 'little?'" Ed seethed through gritted teeth. The man laughed silently to himself.

"I'm not going to waste my breath on you, dog," he stated as he began reaching towards hi right pocket. Ed's eyes widened nervously but heatedly.

"Brace yourself!" he warned, mostly the young woman who was on the ground. The young woman covered her arms over herself before Ed clapped his hands together before placing his metallic arm on the wall next to him. That, in turn, caused a shock of electricity to crack through the wall until the man's area. Then, a stone whip shot out of the wall and attacked the mans hand, causing the weapon he had pulled out to be thrown out of his grip and against the opposite wall before ricocheting onto the floor in the center between the mysterious man and Edward. The man held his now-injured hand and glared at the Alchemist before him.

"You," he muttered. "You're not human." A menacing grin appeared across Ed's features.

"You're wrong," he declared. "I'm quite human…I'm just better than you." The shady man growled irately at the young blonde before running towards him, ignoring the pain of his burning hand. When he was close enough he threw a punch with his opposite hand but failed as Ed caught it in his metallic fist and threw a punch with his other hand, straight towards the man's jaw. The dark-eyed man was forced onto his back on the ground, sadly right next to his weapon.

The Elric shrugged heatedly and quickened his way towards the man. He was, however, too slow. In the short time that it took him to come up to the man, the mysterious figure had already grabbed the gun and aimed it at Ed's head. The Alchemist, however, saw what was coming and swiftly dodged right. This didn't stop the man from shooting, causing a pained scream to escape Ed's lips; the bullet had grazed his left cheek. He looked back at his opposed and glared with burning golden eyes.

"You're going to wish you hadn't done that," he threatened in a low, angry voice as a small, thick drop of blood rolled down his cheek. The man quickly stood to his feet once more, aiming the gun at Ed once more. For a moment, all that could be heard was the hard rain pelting on the ground all around them. Once that moment ended, though, Ed ran towards the man. When he reached him, he miscalculated his punch because the man attacked first, hitting him across the jaw with the handle of his gun.

This, in turn, caused Edward to take a few steps back and examine his burning jaw. He leaned back on the wall of the alley, bending his knees somewhat and lifting his flesh hand to his sore mouth. He wiped his lips on his sleeve and could see some blood smeared across the blue material of his jacket. He groaned lowly before looking back to his adversary. He straightened out his knees, causing his military jacket to slide, slightly off the shoulder of his right arm.

The man immediately took notice of the shining arm beneath the jacket and widened his eyes.

"Automail," he muttered irately. Once Ed was on his feet again, he allowed his blue jacket to fall off his shoulders and to the ground behind his feet, revealing the tight, black tank top he had underneath.

"The jacket was weighing me down anyway," The Elric said cynically as he placed himself in fighting stance once more, grinning at his opponent in a maniacal way. The mysterious man suddenly felt uneasy; he knew, now, who this was and regretted messing with him. This blonde Dog of the State was the one and only Fullmetal Alchemist. He forced himself to put on a strong face as he growled at the teen. But just the way Ed was grinning at him so cynically was making his knees go weak.

"I…I'm not going to waste anymore time on you, _freak!_" he said nervously as he dropped his gun and ran for the exit of the alley. Ed's eyes widened.

"Don't even think about it!" he demanded as he clapped his hands together before placing his right palm on the ground. This caused another blue shock of electricity to shoot through the ground and up to the shady figure. When it reached him, the ground beneath the man lifted up into a gigantic fist which grabbed him before wrapping its fingers, tightly, around him, holding him captive as he struggled to get free. Edward grinned and chuckled in a triumphant yet evil way.

"Bastard," he muttered. He suddenly heard some shuffling behind him, causing his grin to quickly fade and a worried look to replace it. He looked over his shoulder to the victim, who was leaning on her left shoulder to the left wall, clutching her opposite arm tightly from an apparent injury she had. He rapidly turned around and came up behind her, kneeling down on one knee.

"Ma'am," he said in a worried voice. "I'm the Fullmetal Alchemist, State Alchemist, I'm here to help you," he stated as he nervously reached his metallic hand to the young woman's shoulder. She immediately flinched the moment his cold hand connected with her arm, causing Ed to quickly jerk his arm back. "I apologize," he said. "Is your arm injured?" he questioned but got no response from the blonde. This caused the Elric to raise a brow.

"Excuse me, can't you speak?" he continued, softly interrogating her to try and get some answers. Once again, he didn't get a response, not even a shake or nod of the head. The sound of engines roaring began coming nearer and nearer, causing Ed to look over his shoulder just as three military vehicles stationed themselves at the entrance of the alley. The Alchemist looked back to the young woman.

"I'll be right back, please stay here," he ordered gently before standing up and running towards the entrance of the alley. Once he was standing on the sidewalk, the three military cars opened; two had military officers, each armed with guns or rifles, while the last one held Colonel Roy Mustang and his First Lieutenant, Riza Hawkeye.

"Colonel," Ed breathed as he pulled a quick salute to the higher-ranking officer and held it. Mustang walked up to him, switching his focus between the blonde Elric and the man who was held up in a stone fist.

"Major, what happened?" he asked, wondering what the man would've done to get the Elric mad at him. Ed, of which, let his salute fall and looked to the man at his side with a disgusted expression.

"I've put this man under arrest for sexual harassment," he stated sternly. The ebony-haired colonel raised a brow.

"Towards who, prey tell?" he asked. Ed looked over his shoulder to the young woman who was still leaning on the wall while on the ground. Roy and Riza followed his gaze to the young woman before turning back to the Fullmetal Alchemist.

"I tried asking if she was OK," Ed stated as he too, looked back towards his commander and chief. "But she refuses to answer. She's holding her arm tight which leads me to believe that her arm is injured. Why she won't talk, however, is still a mystery to me," he explained in a monotonous tone of voice. He looked up to the higher-ups before him; they were both looking at him as if he was crazy, causing him to raise a brow at them. "What?" he questioned the two.

"Edward," Roy said, his voice hinted with anxiousness. "Don't…you know who that girl is?" he asked him in the same voice. The Elric gave him a curious look before looking back to the young woman. He noted that she had long, light-blonde hair, reminding him somewhat of Winry's hair, she was wearing a long-sleeve white blouse and a brown vest over that with pants that reached her knees in the same color and white two-inch-high boots. He looked back to Mustang.

"Colonel, what are you talking about? I've never seen her before," he stated curiously. Roy and Riza looked at each other before looking back at him.

"Edward," Riza said now. "We thought you knew…that girl…she's…she's Winry." The Elric's eyes widened more greatly than saucers and he took a step back from them.

"What?" he asked nervously as his body began trembling. "No…you're lying," he told them, his voice threatening to crack. The two higher-ups looked dead-serious. He growled at them now. "If this is some kind of sick joke, Mustang, it's not funny!!!" he said angrily.

Their solemn expressions didn't change. This caused the tension in Ed's eyes to be lost. Swiftly, he looked over his shoulder to the young woman before running up behind her once more and sliding to stop before kneeling down next to her once again.

"Is your name Winry Rockbell!?" he demanded from the girl but, again, got no response. "Answer me, damn it!" he ordered heatedly as he grabbed her arm, suddenly and harshly. This caused a pained scream to escape the young woman's mouth.

"Get_ away_ from me!" the woman commanded, finally, as she quickly leaned on her opposite side and slapped the Alchemist across the face, causing his head to turn to his left as his eyes stay wide and shaky. Nervously, his hand slid off the blonde's arm as he kept looking to his left with wide eyes. He was beyond shock at this point; he had caught a glimpse of the woman's face and her severe voice sounded all-too familiar. He was met, for a split-second before being slapped, with familiar sapphire eyes and light blonde hair that framed the young woman's face. It really was Winry.

_Not seeing that loving you  
That's what I was trying to do_

F----------------M----------------A

**A/N: **Whoa .-._ long_song-fic -nervous grin- and it's not even done yet -looks away- anyway, that's right; this story isn't over just yet :) you honestly think I'd leave you like this? Yeah,_ right! _This is too juicy to _not_ continue! So, please R&R, constructive criticism, no flames ;) thanks!

By the way, yes, _Slave Driven _is still in process ;) don't worry; I'm writing, currently, about four different stories, including that one :) so an update will be up soon, for both that story and this one.


	2. Unwanted Hospitality

_**What Hurts the Most**_

**Disclaimer: **I Don't Own _FMA _In Any Way. 

**Rating: **PG—PG-13 Due To Some Angst and Crude Language. 

**A/N: **Thanks to all the people who alerted and reviewed ;) Hope you like! 

F----------------M----------------A

_It can't be, _was Ed's first thought after being slapped across the face. His thoughts were racing; he couldn't even _feel _the stinging sensation of his cheek as his eyes stayed intent on the wall to his left and his thoughts stayed on what just happened. _She _**can't**_ be Winry…Am I losing my mind? _If any time was good to question his sanity, he supposed _now_ was as good a time as ever. He was too sad and heart-broken; this was just his mind playing horrible tricks on him. 

The Elric finally found his motion once more because he blinked once before blinking a few more times and finally receiving signals of pain from the right side of his face. He shook his head and brought his metallic up to his face; the metal connected with his flesh and it immediately felt a little better. He dared to look back to the young woman who he had saved, but had graciously thanked him with a stingy slap across his features. Once his eyes met with hers, however, he realized that his mind was playing no tricks; his golden eyes landed upon the same face he had seen before getting hit. Winry's beautiful yet steaming face was glaring at him heatedly, telling him that she didn't want _his_ help.

"Winry," he breathed, almost unbelieving. He saw that the young woman's face had fined out over the past two years; she looked her age, of course, but she looked mature and…stunning. Even with her hair slightly messy from her attack and her shirt ripped in her right shoulder, she was stunning to Edward. The Alchemist swallowed a lump in his throat as he tried to breath in what was happening right before his eyes. He hadn't seen Winry for two years and, finally, he was staring at her square in the eye; into the eyes that had taunted him for so long.

"Winry…what…what're _you_ doing _here?_" he questioned her nervously. The girl shrugged heatedly and stood up, walking past him, stumbling slightly and still clutching her arm. Ed stood up as well and walked up behind her. The mechanic bent down and picked up something off the floor before standing once more. Picking up her hair in a bun with the clip she had apparently picked up, she held her arm again.

"That's none of your concern, Edward," she told him sternly. "You're a _State Alchemist; _you're job is to help me but, as a citizen, I have right to deny that help and that's what I'm doing," she explained to him without moving from her spot. 

"Winry, but,"—"I also have my right to stay silent now, no matter what," she cut him off angrily. Edward sighed, both discontent and slightly aggravated. 

"Winry," it was the fourth time her name had escaped his lips. "Don't do this, not because of me but because of you; you're injured," he told her worriedly. Winry's eyes widened slightly and she turned around and faced him. 

"How did you know I was hurt?" she asked. 

"You're holding your right arm tight and you've tried to keep holding on for as long as you can; that leads me to believe that it either stings or hurts pretty bad and is bleeding, possibly. Not to mention, you just stumbled which tells me that your leg is screwed up, too," her former friend explained in the same worried tone as before. What he had told her, however, caused Winry's eyes to widen more. Of course, her arm _was_ injured and she wasn't putting too much weight on her right leg because it was also a little banged up from when the man had pushed her to the ground. Nevertheless, she glared at him once more. 

"Again, that's none of _your_ concern; I can take care of myself, thank you," she said heatedly as she turned around once more, refusing to look at the Elric in the face; the face that enticed yet annoyed her for such a long time.

"Oh really?" Ed asked scornfully as he crossed his arms in front of his chest and locked his left hip to his side. "Have you no _idea_ of what could've happened to you if I hadn't shown up?" he demanded angrily. 

"Are you saying that I can't defend myself?" Winry accused immediately, turning around once more. 

"No, I'm saying you _can_ defend yourself you just don't know how! I saw you when that man had you against the wall; you weren't even _trying_ to make an attack to run for it," the Alchemist explained to her in the same annoyed tone of voice.

"Of course I was!" the mechanic snapped back at the young blonde. 

"There's a difference between struggling to get free and actually fighting back," Edward clarified, narrowing his eyes on the young woman before him. The Rockbell, of which, widened her eyes; she was speechless as she realized that the bastard was right; she was trying to get free, not fight back. She huffed out a breath of pure aggravation as she turned around and tried to limp towards the entrance of the alleyway. Her eyes were full of anger and her pride was slightly injured. 

"I'm done with you,' she muttered irately as she walked away. 

"Oh no you're not!" Ed replied as he ran up in front of her, preventing her exit to the area.

"Get out of my way, Ed," the young mechanic demanded. 

"You're still injured," the Elric stated. 

"I think I can patch up a few injuries on my own," Winry clarified as she tried to walk past her former childhood friend but he stood in front of her once more. 

"I can't let you do that," he explained firmly. 

"And why not?" the blue-eyed young woman asked, almost unbelieving that this _jerk_ was even _trying_ to order her around. 

"You're injured and this rainstorm has done nothing but get worse; if you have any common sense in that thick skull of yours, you'd know that this is the perfect condition for crimes to take place. Much more if you're hurt; that just makes it a whole lot easier. I can't let you go home under this storm, much less without protection," the Alchemist declared, trying to sound formal but also stern. Winry practically growled at him. 

"I'll just get an officer to escort me home then," she hissed at him. 

"And how are you so sure that you can trust them? The nicest faces often hide the ugliest of people," Ed retorted, crossing his arms again. 

"Look who's talking," Winry muttered quietly, mostly to herself but Edward caught it. He chose to not comment on it, however. 

"And don't even ask Mustang or Hawkeye." This sparked Winry's curiosity and she gave the blonde an intrigued look. "Mustang already has a huge pile of paperwork to file and sign," The Elric continued. "And Hawkeye's got to make sure he does it all, considering the lazy bastard has the attention span of a rat when it comes to paperwork." The Automail tech's right eye twitched slightly as she could almost already read what was going on through the Elric's mind. 

"Then what are you proposing? That _you_ escort me home? Because I won't allow it!" she asked him furiously. 

"Hell no," Edward replied. "I'm off duty, number one, and, number two, I'm not escorting_ anyone_ under this rain; I'm actually getting tired of it with every passing second. No, I'm taking you home so I can tend to your injuries and harbor you until the rain lets up." The blonde mechanic widened her eyes and glared at the other blonde with an anger that couldn't even be defined. 

"Have you lost your mind?" she ordered from him. 

"Of all the things I've lost…I couldn't_ possibly _miss my mind any less."

F----------------M----------------A

After many protests and spiteful incoherencies, Edward managed to drag Winry back to his home across the street. He ordered her to stay seated on the black sofa he had against the wall that was parallel to the entrance. Against her better judgment, she agreed to stay put while Ed walked back out to give Mustang his eyewitness account of the incident. The Colonel knew that Ed had no personal feelings at the beginning of the incident, seeing as he didn't know the victim was Winry, so he believed him and said that a file would be reported soon, and the man would most likely be put on trial within the next few weeks or so. After that, Mustang, his lieutenant, and his officers climbed into their military cars and drove off towards HQ. 

After that, Ed returned to his home, his military jacket over his shoulders but not actually on. He entered closing and locking his front door afterwards. The blonde looked across the room to Winry, causing his eyes to droop; she looked somewhat sad as she sat there with her arms hugging her as she stared down at the floor. 

"Winry," he uttered boldly. Winry's sullen expression changed as she looked up and glared once again.

"What?" she asked scornfully. 

"Win, I _know_ you don't want to be here."—"Then let me go home!" the mechanic interrupted angrily. Ed sighed quietly and walked deeper into his home until he was standing a few feet in front of the young woman. 

"I'm doing this for your own good, Win; even leaving you alone can lead to something. Like I said, rainy weather is the best time for people to commit crimes," he told her, trying to make her understand. 

"And how would _you_ know _that?_" Winry asked; she was becoming very aggravated with this situation. 

"Blood is thicker than water…but continuously flowing water can wash away evidence that said blood ever existed." Winry couldn't help but widen her eyes at the seriousness in his voice as he told her this. Ed then walked off, leaving the Rockbell to ponder over what he had said. She hugged herself more tightly as she leaned forward, her mind full of thoughts; many consisted of Ed. The Elric, of which, returned after a few moments with something in his arms.

"Here," he told her softly as he handed her the blue towel that he had gotten. "Dry yourself off; once you're done with that, I can fix your arm and leg and find you some dry clothes." Winry silently took the cloth and unfolded it, carefully drying her damp body from the rain. Ed then walked off towards the stairs that were hidden behind the wall where the sofa sat. Once Winry finished drying herself off as much as she could, she wrapped the blue towel over her shoulders in an attempt to warm up. 

The towel was soft, even if it was slightly damp. The Rockbell sighed to herself. Her mind strayed back to Ed and she wondered whether she should thank him for his hospitality, even after all that's happened, or knock him out for harboring her in his home against her will. After a few minutes, she could hear the sound of boots stepping down the stairs. Ed was, once again, standing in front of her as he came down. 

Winry followed up his legs until her eyes met with his; the Alchemist was holding a small, white box in his hands and was missing the military jacket that had, moments ago, resided on his shoulders. His face looked worried but also stern. He took the liberty of sitting on her right side and opening the little container. Inside, Winry could see a roll of bandage, antiseptics and some small pieces of white cotton. Ed grabbed a square-shaped cotton patch and a small bottle of medicine. The Elric turned towards her. 

"I don't expect you to thank me for this," he stated as he placed the cotton on his lap and opened the bottle. "But I'm not looking for your appreciation; I just want to help." He grabbed the cotton once more and carefully poured some of the liquid onto it, letting it absorb. Once there was enough to make the patch damp but not soaking, Ed placed the bottle on the floor before reaching to Winry's arm. He stopped, however, and awaited permission from the Rockbell. 

Winry looked to him and automatically understood why he hadn't touched her yet. Just like when they were younger; they didn't need words to comprehend each other's thoughts. The Automail tech lifted her arm, indicating he begin as she dropped her other arm on her lap and looked to the floor. Ed gently grabbed her upper arm with his flesh hand before hovering the patch over her injury. 

"This is going to sting," he warned. Winry said nothing and Ed continued the task at hand. He pressed the cotton onto the scraped flesh of her right shoulder. Winry tensed, immediately, from the burning sensation of her arm. 

"How'd this happen anyway?" the Elric asked as he continued to press the cloth, gently, into her injury, letting the disinfectant do its job. He felt terrible causing Winry pain like this but it was for the better and that kept him composed. 

"When the man pushed me," Winry struggled to say as she prayed that Ed would remove the Godforsaken patch soon. "I fell on my shoulder and the ground scraped it; the same goes for my leg," she replied, forcing aside the minor pain she was feeling. Finally, after Ed had disinfected every damn inch of her injury, he removed the little patch and closed the bottle once more before placing it back in the white box. Afterwards, he grabbed another piece of cotton, a different bottle and the roll of bandage. Opening the new bottle, he poured some on the smallish cloth and repeated the process. 

"This one will sting much less than the other, I promise," the golden-blonde-haired young man stated, trying to sound somewhat humorous. Winry wasn't really amused but she allowed him to place the new piece on her arm. When it connected with her flesh, she resisted the urge to sigh, relieved; it was cold but refreshing to her wound. 

"Hold it," Ed asked of her. The Rockbell followed the command before placing her hand upon his. Ed's eyes widened slightly and he blushed. Winry, on the other hand, looked away and scowled at the innocent floor. Edward quickly pulled his hand away and tried to make the blush at his cheeks reduce by grabbing the bandage roll and beginning to unroll it slightly. He placed one end of the tape on Winry's arm, telling her to let go, which she did, as he began to wrap it, tightly, around her injury, cotton cloth still in place. 

"Winry?" he asked, trying to make light conversation and hopefully get some answers out of the girl. 

"What do you want?" the Rockbell replied irately. Ed sighed discontentedly; he could tell by the tone of her voice that she _really_ didn't want him talking to her. 

"I was wondering if I could ask you something…" he mumbled as he continued to wrap her arm in bandage tape, soon to finish. 

"If you must," Winry muttered back. The Elric finished wrapping her upper arm before ripping it and tucking it within the bandage. He gestured her for her leg, which she obliged, unwillingly. She sat towards the opposite end of the sofa and brought up her wounded leg, carefully, onto it. Ed looked down at the scrape before repeating the process that he had done with her arm. As he was doing this, he finally asked her his question. 

"Why'd you come to Central?"

F----------------M----------------A

**A/N: **Cliffhangers rule, do they not? XD Please R&R, constructive criticism, no flames ;) thanks! 


	3. Revitalization

_**What Hurts the Most**_

**Disclaimer: **I Don't Own _FMA _In Any Way.

**Rating: **PG—PG-13 Due To Some Angst and Crude Language.

**A/N: **Hope you like :)

**WARNING: **Some manga spoilers in there ;)

F----------------M----------------A

Winry looked back at him, her blue eyes sending daggers to him.

"I told you, that's_ none of your concern,_ Ed!" she seethed at him. "I'm not giving you information that you don't need to know about." This certainly wasn't the answer Edward was hoping for. He mentally slapped himself for what he would do to the girl next. He poured antiseptic on a cotton patch and placed a hand on her leg before placing the patch down on her injury, no warning beforehand. Winry screamed out slightly, as the stinging was unexpected and he was pressing the patch harshly into her injury.

"Edward, that hurts!" she scolded painfully and heatedly.

"Tell me what you're doing in Central," Edward said quietly, pressing the cloth harder into her injury. "And the pain will go away before you can say 'Automail.'" Winry glared at him. She could either take the pain or tell him; he needed to take away the patch sooner or later, right? But still, that stinging was so annoyingly unbearable.

"Fine!" she agreed finally and, almost immediately after, the pain of her leg was gone and she was secretly grateful.

"So?" Ed asked. "Start talking." He continued tending to her wounded leg as he waited for Winry to begin speaking. It stayed tensely silent for a few moments as Ed kept his eyes on the Rockbell's injury while Winry kept her eyes on her hands.

"It…it happened at least a year after you left," she began finally, her voice small and quiet. Edward said nothing and waited for her to continue. "During that year, our Automail business was getting really slow. My regulars stopped showing up because they moved out of Resembol. Then…" she trailed off, not willing to continue her story. Ed looked up to her.

"What? What happened?" he asked, with his voice and face full of worriment. Winry hung her head lower, hiding her eyes behind her light blonde bangs. Ed could see her shoulders begin to tremble slightly, causing his eyes to widen nervously and sadly. "Winry?" he asked softly.

"Granny…granny Pinako passed away, Ed," she whispered finally, her voice shaky. The Elric's eyes widened greatly at this news and his hands stopped moving; he couldn't believe this happened. On top of that, he was finding out a year later. He was filled with mixed emotions; sympathy, sadness, and anger.

"What!?" he demanded finally; it seemed his anger always overcame all other emotions. "Why the _hell_ didn't you try to call me, damn it! I understand that you and I weren't exactly seeing Eye to eye but Pinako meant something to Al and me, too!" he yelled to her irately, his golden orbs full of anger. He accidentally placed his metal hand down on her leg's injury and pressed hard, causing Winry to scream and hug herself more tightly. As she threw her head forward slightly, Ed's angry expression changed from anger to sympathy as he could see tears streaming down the young woman's face.

"Winry?" he asked anxiously as he pulled his hand away immediately. He looked down at his hand before looking back to the Automail tech; her blood was on his metallic palm and he cursed himself for causing her pain and getting her blood on his hand.

"I didn't want to speak with you then, Ed…I wasn't interested in telling you that because I didn't want to see you come all the way from Central back to Resembol; I know how important your work is to you," Winry replied in a quiet but angry voice. Ed's eyes widened before tensing and closing as he looked away, glaring at the floor. The mechanic didn't call him because, unlike him, she was trying to move on and didn't want to be caused anymore trouble. The Elric hated himself for starting all of this.

"After that," Winry continued, her eyes still crying slightly and her voice cracking. "Business got to the point where I couldn't afford to pay for the house's bills or even supplies. I sold the house and, with the money, I moved to Central to try and get some more customers," she explained sadly. The Alchemist looked back to her again.

"You _sold_ your grandmother's house?" he asked, almost unbelieving.

"I had no choice!" Winry defended immediately. "It was either sell the house and use the money to move or stay and eventually get left out in the streets! I was limited on choices, Ed, and didn't have a whole lot of places to go," she explained heatedly. "So I moved."

"Did things get better?" Ed asked as he was about to wrap bandages around the young woman's injury.

"Yes," Winry replied. "There are much more people who need Automail around here and they've apparently heard of how good my work is," he told him silently. "I've even been able to give Den a new limb," she added with a small smile and chuckle, momentarily forgetting who she was talking to. Once Ed heard her small laugh and saw her smile, he couldn't help but smile back at the Rockbell.

"How is Den anyway?" he asked, the smile still playing on his features. Winry looked back to him and widened her eyes slightly; the Elric looked…_oh no,_ she thought._ Don't admit it; he is_ **not** _cute when he smiles!_ She shook the thought away before replying.

"She's getting older as the days go by but she's fine," she told him finally.

"That's good to hear," Ed mumbled before finishing. He ripped and tucked the bandage away securely around Winry's leg before putting away the supplies in the little white box once more. "There," he said as he closed the container. "Now we can find you some dry clothes; we don't you catching a cold," he stood up and headed towards the stairs. Before climbing them, he looked back to the Rockbell on his sofa.

"Coming?" he asked. Winry looked up to him but shrugged.

"Can't you just let me go home already?" she asked, somewhat annoyed. Edward sighed before looking out of a nearby window; it was still pouring, worse then before might he add.

"It's still raining really badly, Winry," he replied. "This storm's done nothing but get worse…it's too risky to leave you alone, I don't want anything to happen to you," he turned back to her, his face worried. Although she didn't show it, the Automail tech was surprised that the Elric still worried about her so much even after the ways she had been treating him. She sighed quietly before standing up carefully, limping her way to Ed. The Alchemist let her walk before himself so that he could help her if she fell.

They reached the second floor without any accidents. Ed then led Winry down the hall towards his bedroom. Once they reached it, Ed gently pushed open the door and walked in. Winry, on the other hand, stayed just outside the entrance to his room while holding both arms. Ed seemed just a little _too_ comfortable with having her walk into_ his_ room.

Once Ed was to the other side of the room, he leaned on his dresser and looked to Winry. He was surprised, slightly, to see her at his entrance instead of at his side. The blonde cocked an eyebrow in her direction.

"You're supposed to come in," he stated. The Rockbell stayed silent as her hold on herself became tighter. "Come on, Winry, I don't bite," the Alchemist said to her, trying to sound humorous as he smiled and chuckled. Winry shrugged unsurely.

_That's not what I'm afraid of, _she thought to herself as she carefully stepped into his room, finally, and walked up to the blonde. She took a moment to look around his room; it was very like him. The bed in the center was unmade while the desk at the other side of the room had a few stacks of papers and books upon it. It was neat in a messy way. She chuckled to herself at the familiarity of it all.

Turning back to the Elric, her smile faded and she waited for him to speak. Ed, of which, leaned his back on the side of his dresser and looked to Winry. The dresser was about his height and with six long drawers, each with two handles for opening. Ed, with his flesh hand, pointed over his shoulder to the drawer at the very top.

"T-shirts and tank tops," he stated and then pointed to the second drawer below it. "Long-sleeve shirts and sweaters," he said and then brought his hand down to the third drawer. "Pants and I'm pretty sure I have a few shorts, too," he told her as he pulled his hand away and crossed his arms. "Take your pick." Winry looked down to the last few drawers but chose not to question on what they contain. She nodded once at him before the Elric walked towards the door and leaned on his shoulder on the door frame.

Winry looked back to the dresser; she immediately decided on a t-shirt and shorts. She reached to the top drawer and opened it before pulling out a black t-shirt and closing the drawer once more. She then did the same with the third and grabbed a pair of black shorts with a white stripe on the right pant leg. She then walked behind Ed, telling her she had gotten her desired clothes. The Alchemist looked at her over his shoulder.

"Would you like to take a shower or just dry off with a towel?" he asked politely without turning around.

"How about a bath?" Winry asked back. Ed smiled kindly at her; he knew the difference between shower and bath. The young woman was probably looking for a little relaxation from the day's craziness.

"Sure," he replied as he got off his door frame and began walking. In that moment, however, the phone in his room rang. "Uh…hold on," he said nervously as he walked back into the bedroom and, on his night desk, was the ringing phone. He picked it up and brought it to his ear. "Hello?" he asked and waited to voice of whoever was calling him. "Oh, hey Alphonse." Winry's eyes widened and she walked up next to him once more.

She could hear the younger's voice saying something to his older brother but she couldn't quite catch it and simply waited, hoping for an explanation from Edward.

"Hold on a minute, Al," Ed said suddenly before removing the phones from his ear and covering the speaker with his other hand. "Winry," he said as he turned to the blonde mechanic at his side. "The bathroom is just down the hall, the door to your right," he directed so that she wouldn't have to wait for him.

"I want to talk to Al," Winry said back to him. The Elric in front of her became slightly annoyed before handing her the phone.

"Here," he said. Winry took the phone and brought it up to her ear.

"Hi, Al, it's me, Winry," she said immediately.

"_Winry? Winry Rockbell?" _the younger Elric said, obviously confused.

"That's right," the mechanic told him happily.

"_What are_ **you**_ doing there? I thought…well, you know…" _he trailed off, unwilling to neither relive nor explain the heart-breaking event that took place two years ago.

"It's a long story that I'm sure your brother will share with you," she said and then glared over to Ed, who simply huffed out a breath while crossing his arms, aggravated.

"_Okaaaay…anyway, how have you been?" _Al asked, still slightly confused.

"I'm fine…what about you, Al? I've really missed you," Winry said back sadly, clutching the phone with both hands. Al sighed in the same discontent manner before replying to her.

"_Fine…I've missed you too…Winry?" _the younger said.

"Yeah, Al, what is it?" the Rockbell asked him, wondering what the Alchemist could want.

"_Do…do you think you and Nii-San and you will ever make up? Ed's changed a lot since he left, you know." _This certainly sparked some interest in Winry.

"What do you mean?" she asked worriedly but also trying to stay composed to not worry Edward. It stayed tensely silent as Al looked for the right words.

"_He really misses you, Winry…I think…I think he may be suffering from a kind of depression." _Winry's eyes widened nervously. Ed, suffering from depression? That was impossible; Winry had known Ed for a long time—since they were little kids, to be exact—and, even after losing his mom and then his arm, leg and younger brother's body, he was much stronger than to allow depression to take over him. Al had to be mistaken. She allowed him to continue, hopeful to hear that it wasn't as bad as the younger thought.

"_Winry,"_ he continued._ "I've visited him every now and then…he daydreams a lot more often than usual and he can't seem to pay attention very well. He's become really slow for his own good and, when I've visited, he sometimes has bad dreams and I've heard him cry out your name sometimes," _Al explained sadly. This all surprised Winry very much, on the other hand. Edward said her name in his sleep? She suddenly wondered how bad his dreams were.

Winry carefully looked over her shoulder to Ed, who had taken to looking down to the ground as he waited for her to finish her conversation. She immediately took note of how sad he looked and began taking into consideration what Al had told her. She looked ahead once more before speaking once more.

"Thanks for telling me this, Al," she said both sorrowfully but grateful. "But I'm not sure if we can fix this whole mess," she told him. The young woman then heard a sigh escape from the younger Elric's lips.

"_OK…it was nice talking to you again, Winry," _Alphonse told her kindly.

"Same here," Winry said before handing the phone back to Ed. What Al had said was true because she noticed that it had taken Ed a few moments to comprehend and finally take the phone in his hand once more. She then walked down the hall and into the bathroom. Once inside, she eavesdropped on Ed as she left the door a crack open. She heard him explain to Al why Winry was within his home before demanding that the younger tell him what he had told Winry.

She heard the older Elric shrug irately many times before he actually spoke back.

"I'm sorry, Al, but it's not as easy as you make it seem; easier said than done, as they say," he told him. "I want to make up with Winry for what I've done to her, but…I doubt she's forgiven me for what I did…how the hell could I have left her again, Al? What in the world possessed me to rejoin the damn military, for crying out loud!" he said, obviously angry at himself. He stayed silent now as he was listening to his younger sibling speak to him. He was growing somewhat annoyed, apparently.

"What do you expect me to do, Al, tell her I still love her even after all this time!?" Winry's eyes widened greatly as she retreated into the bathroom and leaned her back on the wall, covering her mouth with her hand, trying to hide a gasp. She finally understood why Ed could still be so kind to her and hospitable even after the way she had been treated him. It was…because he loved her—no! He _still_ loved her, which meant he had fallen in love with her a long time ago.

She couldn't believe what she had just heard but she was automatically reminded of when she had admitted her own love for him when she was younger. She had been throwing those thoughts aside for a full two years but they were coming back. Just as she was going to listen once more, she heard the phone gently hit the receiver. Closing and locking the bathroom door, she carefully walked up to the bathtub as she tried to figure everything out. But she couldn't; she both hated Ed for leaving her but her old feelings were being revitalized.

Perhaps, however…they had never died out.

F----------------M----------------A

By the time Winry had finished bathing, Edward had gone downstairs to wait for the Rockbell on his sofa. Eventually, however, he had lied down and fallen asleep. Winry, on the other hand, was very thoughtful as she took her less-than-relaxing bath. Her thoughts were clouded with images of Edward; his smile, his voice, the way his face looked when he slept. It was all suddenly so intoxicating.

She felt bad for Ed, she honestly did. She couldn't, and didn't_ want _to believe that he could be suffering from _any_ kind of depression. On top of that, she was still surprised that he could _possibly_ love her even after she had told him to never come back to her again. Then again, when she was younger, she would have been surprised if he loved her at all. But she also hated him.

She hated him for leaving her so many times when they were younger only to leave permanently when the mess in his life was finally over. Now she wondered, though, was it really hate or just…deep, temporary anger? Yes, Ed _had_ left her but she should've seen it coming; the Elric wasn't one to stay still for very long and was most likely looking for something to occupy himself, and pay him money for his needs, of course. It was either stay in Resembol with the incredible knowledge and skills of a professional scientist or go to Central and become a State Alchemist once again so that he could put those skills to use while doing research for the government. Now that she thought about it, she was glad for him that he had chosen to leave; he was bettering his own life while also even saving lives of innocent people, as he had done with her earlier that very day.

Speaking of which, she also thought about what could've happened if he _hadn't_ shown up in that faithful moment. From the tub, she looked over at her clothes; her blouse was ripped and that taunted her slightly. What Ed had said to the man suddenly rung in her head like a broken record; _sexual_ harassment. She was suddenly _extremely_ grateful for the Alchemist's arrival, especially after what Ed told her; she was struggling to get free instead of fight back. Maybe if she had fought back maybe she would've had a chance of getting away at all.

What was done was done, however, and she owed a certain golden blonde Alchemist a _huge_ thank you. She also needed to open his eyes; confirm that he was undergoing depression and then find evidence to prove it to him. Heaven knows his stubborn ass won't accept it so easily. Afterwards, she needed to try and help him; find out whether or not_ she_ was the one causing his pain or if it was another outside force. If it was her…she needed to apologize for everything _she's_ done to him.

And show him she still cares for him.

F----------------M----------------A

**A/N: **Finally getting an update on this story :) sorry for the late update but I've been kind of busy with other stuff that isn't my writing -nervous grin- anyway, please R&R, constructive criticism, no flames! ;) Thanks!


	4. Unexpected Apologies

What Hurts the Most

_**What Hurts the Most**_

**Disclaimer: **I Don't Own _FMA _In Any Way.

**Rating: **PG—PG-13 Due To Some Angst and Crude Language.

**A/N: **Thanks for reviews! :)

* * *

F--M--A

* * *

When Winry finished bathing, she changed into the clothes she had gotten from Ed's dresser and then went to Ed's bedroom with her clothes in her arms. She knocked on his door but heard no response. The Rockbell looked inside and didn't see him there so decided to check downstairs. Once there, she placed her clothes on a chair before looking to the sofa. Her eyes widened as she saw the Elric on said couch, fast asleep on his back while his right leg hung off the edge and his Automail arm was on his stomach, lifting his shirt slightly and exposing his firm stomach a little.

She shook her head humorously before walking up to him and smiling at his face; it was the exact face she had pictured as she was bathing, except a little older and even more mature-looking. Her smile faded, however, when she noticed something beneath his loose, closed eyes. Something she hadn't taken notice of until right now; stress lines, _deep_ stress lines. She knelt down beside him before, gently, tracing the lines with her index finger. The Alchemist shrugged silently from her touch right before Winry jerked her hand back, afraid he would awake. Instead, Edward turned on his side, letting his back face Winry as he brought his leg on the sofa and leaned on his flesh arm while the other lay next to his chest.

Winry couldn't help but smile at this somewhat humoristic action. But now she had a piece of evidence that something was wrong with her childhood friend. She looked from his face down the rest of his body. She stopped at his chest as she noted something else. Luckily, his black tank top was tight enough for her to clearly see it; the outline of his rib cage. Her eyes widened slightly at this; she had never been able to see his rib cage, not so defined, anyway.

Ed had always been rather lean; there was no denying that fact. Even since he was much younger, he was skinny but, in due time, he grew muscles that stuck out more. He had a six pack of abs and even his flesh arm had defined volume to its muscle. He had, however, never been lean enough for her to see his rib cage as clearly as she could see it now. This worried her greatly, as weight-loss was another sign of depression.

The young woman sighed sadly; things were worse than she thought. She expected him to just be sad but what she had found was unbelievable. She had no choice anymore; what Al said was true and that confirmed her fear. Now she needed to find out if it really was _her_ causing his pain or if it may have been some other thing in his life; stress from work or perhaps even the fact that the younger sibling wasn't around. She figured she should find out how long the younger Elric had been gone and what led to his leaving.

She looked back to the Alchemist's precious sleeping face. The blonde Rockbell mechanic suddenly felt very guilty for having to wake the poor thing. Not only that but she asked herself how she could've _possibly_ hurt this adorable soul in any way. She sighed, discontent, before looking back to the Elric before her. Nervously, she placed her hand on his metallic shoulder before leaning over him.

"Ed? Edward, wake up," she told him softly while gently shaking him. Unsurprisingly, Ed shrugged silently but irately, obviously not willing to wake up from the comfy slumber he had fallen into. "Ed, it's me, Winry, wake up," she tried again, surprisingly getting a different response. The Elric's eyes carefully opened before he blinked a few more times, obviously getting accustomed to the little light. Soon after, he awoke finally and looked up to the two sapphire orbs looking down at him.

"Winry?" he asked with his voice somewhat scratchy as he had just woken up. "What is it, is something wrong?" he asked, his voice becoming worried but staying tired.

"No, no," the Rockbell replied anxiously while shaking her head slightly. "I…I need to talk to you," she told him, her voice still hinting with nervousness. She noted that Ed's eyes widened slightly, undeniably surprised that she would want _anything_ with him after how she had been acting. Nevertheless, he obliged.

"OK…" he mumbled before sitting up on his knees and rubbing his eyes with the back of his metallic hand, obviously hoping the cold metal would awake him more. Winry took the liberty of standing up and sitting next to the other blonde. Once Ed had stretched a little after rubbing his eyes, he sat on the sofa properly and faced the girl to his left side.

"I'm surprised you didn't leave while I was asleep," he told her, half humorously, half angrily.

"If you had fallen asleep earlier, I probably would have," Winry clarified sadly as she looked down to her hands. Edward picked up on the sadness in her voice and widened his eyes, obviously taken aback.

"What's that mean?" he asked her, intrigued. It stayed tensely silent for a few moments before Winry spoke, finally.

"Ed," she said edgily. The blue-eyed young woman thought carefully of the words she would tell him. "I…I owe you a _huge_ amount of gratitude…" she said as her fingers fumbled and she timidly looked up to the Elric. Ed, on the other hand, cocked a brow at her.

"Gratitude?" he questioned. "Why? I didn't really do anything significant…" he trailed off, unsure what he possibly could've done to suddenly earn himself the appreciation of the Rockbell, seeing as she had apparently hated his guts the moment she noticed him. Winry, however, was surprised at his inquiry; how was saving her _not_ significant? Not only that but he tended to her wounds, even if she wanted to deny his help at the time. She sighed silently before responding.

"Ed…if it weren't…if you hadn't shown up when that man attacked me…" she began, unsure of how to speak of it and tell him; there was so much she suddenly wanted to say to him. "I…I don't even _want _to know what could've happened…" she said as she looked away and hugged herself. Edward's eyes widened and he began thinking of the possibilities. It scared him. He didn't want to think of it either.

But he still didn't deserve the young woman's gratitude; when he saved her, he was just doing his job. He didn't even _know_ it was her until _after_ he had saved her. At the time, as far as he was concerned she was just another citizen in need of help. He wanted her appreciation at the moment, seeing as he was desperate for _something_ positive from her, but he couldn't take something like that for just attending to his duties.

"Winry," he said quietly. "You don't need to thank me; I was just doing my job. As a matter of fact," he mentally slapped himself with an Automail hand for what he'd tell her. "I didn't even know it was you until Mustang and Riza pointed it out," he explained dejectedly. The girl at his side gave him a sympathetic look as she watched him look away from to the ground.

Taking a deep breath, she forced a small smile to appear on her face before, nervously, reaching over and placing her hand on his flesh one, making sure he felt what she was doing. This small act caused the Elric to widen his eyes greatly but not say a word. His cheeks tinted with a light shade of pink.

"I kind of figured that," Winry told him. "When you asked me if my name was Winry Rockbell," she explained silently while gently clutching his hand in hers. Ed's eyes reduced in size once more and he sighed before looking up to a nearby window. His blush faded and he sighed sorrowfully.

"You can go, you know?" he asked but Winry could tell it was half-hearted.

"Why do you say that?" she questioned.

"The rain should let up soon …I can only use the whole 'it's dangerous when it's raining' excuse for so long," the Alchemist explained, slipping his hand out of Winry's grip as he stood up and walked to the wall that concealed the staircase and leaned on it with crossed arms on his metal shoulder. His facial expression was a mix of desperateness, sadness and frustration. Winry stood up after him and then walked behind him.

"Do you _want_ me to leave?" she asked quietly, only loud enough for his ears alone. She noticed his shoulders tense up a bit as his hold on himself became tighter. It stayed silent for what felt like an eternity before the Elric finally came up with an answer.

"Of course not," he said. "But I'm sure _you _don't want to be here as much _I_ want you to…" he said, his small voice full of depression.

"Ed, how can you be so sure?"—"Just go, Winry!" he interjected heatedly. The Rockbell took a step back, surprised by his demanding outburst. "I know that's what you want so just go!" It was a false command, only fueled by the knowledge of thinking that once she left, she would _never_ come back.

"Edward…" Winry mumbled to him, trying to remain calm. "I…I'm worried about you…" she confessed finally. Her declaration only made Ed cock his head up and widen his eyes, surprised. How could she_ possibly_ be worried about him when she had come into his home with hatred towards him? He stayed still, contemplating and speechless. The Automail tech then, carefully, walked up in front of him and looked up into his golden eyes with stress lines evident beneath them. Surprisingly, Ed snapped out of his daze and managed to look into her eyes as well.

He gave a confused look as he tried to make words but shook his head and looked to the ground.

"I don't understand," he told her finally. "How can you be worried about me? I don't get it…" he looked to her once more. Winry took another deep breath before reaching up and gently brushing away a few random strands from the Elric's face, all of which simply fell back in their previous place. It was silent as the two simply gazed into each other's eyes, admiring the sight they hadn't seen for two full years.

"I'm starting to believe what Al told me," Winry explained in a soft voice as her arm came back to her side.

"What do you mean?" Edward asked curiously.

"He…he thinks you might be suffering from depression." Ed's eyes widened, unbelieving and surprised, at the words that had just left Winry's lips as his lips separated slightly.

"And so do I," she continued. "You've changed in the past two years, Ed, and something's aren't a good change…" she explained quietly. Edward shrugged, all his muscles tensing as his eyes fell closed and his right eyebrow twitched.

"Al overreacts about a lot of stuff, Winry," he muttered. "If you believe him about that, then _both_ of you have lost your minds!" he said to her heatedly. "Besides, where could you have pulled such a ludicrous idea? Al's just a bit concerned is all; he can't possibly think I'm suffering from depression." This explanation caused a sigh to escape the young woman's lips as her eyes tensed and she glared at the golden-eyed young man before her.

"Al doesn't overreact unless it's something serious, Ed!" she said strongly as her hands balled into fists and her stance became defensive. "And even then, he tries to keep a cool head. Besides, I can prove it to you!" she said, her voice becoming worried again but her hands remaining in rock-hard fists. Ed growled lowly before he got off the wall he was leaning on and stood up straight, glaring back at the Rockbell.

"Really?" he questioned, his arms crossing once more and his hip locking to his left side. Winry recognized the pose immediately and couldn't help but mentally smile in spite of everything.

_I suppose something's never change, _she thought humorously. Her thoughts became serious once more, however, and her muscles stiffened up. Her already-tightly-clenched fists clenched even tighter if that was possible and she could care less if her nails broke the skin of her palm or not.

"After I bathed, I came down here and saw that you were asleep. Had I not been so worried, I probably would've had half a mind to leave without a word but I didn't!" Ed's golden orbs softened; he was surprised that the blue-eyed young woman didn't leave him when she had such an open chance. When Ed was asleep, he usually preferred to stay that way until he was fully rested. Whatever little disturbance tried to wake him, he would just try his own best to ignore it and keep to the darkness, and stay dreaming. Dreams were so much better to him that his reality; in his dreams, he was calm and content instead of paranoid and spiteful.

"So what? You woke me up so you could leave and make sure I saw it!?" he demanded, his eyes tensing once again as the negative side popped into his mentality. Winry, in turn, shrugged heatedly and clutched her fists even tighter.

"No, you_ idiot!_" she responded immediately while glaring with boiling blue eyes. "I was looking for anything that could prove to you that you_ were_ suffering and, you know what? I did find something!" Ed's eyes widened nervously at this and he brought his arms down to his sides.

"What do you mean?" he asked as his shoulders slumped simultaneously.

"Ed, have you even looked in a mirror lately?" Winry questioned, her voice both angry but also filled with worry. The Elric shrugged and looked away.

"No," he muttered lowly. He couldn't stand to look at himself in the mirror; the man he saw was pathetic and lower than dirt. The man he saw always disgusted him and he couldn't stand the sight of his golden eyes; the eyes that had brought Winry so much pain in the past. His golden hair taunted him in a similar way, as did his metallic limbs, of course. Winry, on the other hand, looked at him more concerned.

"Well you should," she told him quietly.

"For what?" was the Alchemist's response. "To see someone who hurt you for so many years? To just see what a complete failure and jerk I've been? Or to be reminded of how many times I let you and everyone else down? Take your pick," his voice was low, sad, and filled with every possible negative emotion known. The blonde was obviously angry at himself and sad for what he's done in his life.

"You never let anyone down, Ed," Winry told him dejectedly.

"Of course I did!" he retorted immediately. His hands now also balled into fists and his eyes grew tenser than what they were. "And because of that, I can never look at myself again! Every time I see myself, I think about what I've done to so many people, including you!" He was trying so very hard to keep back the tears that were threatening to break his barrier as these words left his mouth.

"What about those lines under your eyes!? Do you even _know_ that they're there!?" the Rockbell before him demanded angrily. Ed sighed, obviously growing annoyed.

"That's a lie, isn't it?" he asked back. Winry's eyes widened, surprised at the words he had told her.

"I don't _lie_, Ed! Especially not to you!" she defended instantaneously. Edward's eyes, for the umpteenth time this day, widened greatly and he was left speechless. How could he make a comeback, after all? Winry was right; she had never lied to him. Of the two of them, she was the most honest, trustworthy and healthy-minded. As much as he wanted to prove her wrong, he just couldn't; she was right and he needed to accept that. He needed to trust her again. Sadly, he was much too full of pride to do so.

"I…I don't believe you!" he retorted angrily.

"Then let me prove it to you!" Winry didn't even give the golden-blonde time to think as she quickly grabbed his metallic wrist and forced the Automail arm in front of his face, so that the protective plate was mere inches away from his face so that he could clearly see the truth. Once his arm was in front of him, Ed's eyes widened and the two stayed silent as he stared into the reflection of his golden orbs for the first time in many months. He was shocked, to say the least. Winry was right; there were deep, _deep_ stress lines beneath his eyes that looked like a bird had scratched him with talons the devil himself had carved.

Winry noted that his eyes began trembling but she stayed in her position, trying to force back her emotions as she waited for her friend's response. There was a long pause before; finally, she felt his metal arm begin to pull away from her grasp. She, reluctantly, let his arm go and right after looked him in the eye. Just by the way he looked at her; Winry could tell that he was unconvinced. She shrugged silently.

"That could be caused by anything, Winry," Edward told her defiantly. "I do work really hard, you know; maybe I'm just stressed out from work, especially with all the freaking paperwork Mustang gives me," he explained. Winry couldn't argue there as it was generally true; each person reacts differently to different kinds of stress. Work as hectic as being a Major in the Military probably took its toll on the Elric's fatigue. This wasn't the only proof she had, however.

"What about your weight?" she questioned the teen sternly. Ed gave her a confused yet intrigued look.

"What are you talking about, I'm fine!" he told her strongly.

"No, you're not!" Winry denied instantly. "While you were sleeping, you turned on your side. Ed, I have _never_ seen your rib cage as clearly as I saw it in that moment!" she said. Her voice was softening as she spoke to him; worriment was beyond evident in her voice as she stared at the Elric before her sympathetically. "Ed…I'm really…" she looked him in the eye, momentarily unsure of how to speak. She swallowed the lump in her throat and forced herself to continue. "I'm really worried about you."

The golden-eyed Alchemist widened his eyes and became breathless. Was his broken and tortured heart playing tricks on him? That was the third time she had repeated that phrase. Did he _really_ just hear _Winry_ say she's _worried _about _him?_ It felt much too good to be true. Perhaps this was another one of his dreams; the ones where everything was right and no one hated him…especially not Winry. His eyes fell, half-lidded, as he looked to the floor at his side and his brows tensed slightly.

Winry took note of his minor body movements and also noticed his fists clenching tightly. She could lightly hear the sound of his metallic fingers silently clanging against his palm. She looked back to his face and stared at him with soft, nervous ocean-blue eyes. It felt like an eternity before Ed finally made another move. The Elric lowered his head and allowed his bangs to create a shadow to hide his golden orbs.

She saw his body back up as she heard his boot-covered foot take a step back. Her eyes widened as she saw his face tense up further, in a saddened manner.

"This isn't…this _can't_ be real," he mumbled as he brought his head up once more and shook his head.

"Ed…?" Winry asked back, worried. She watched as the Elric continued to take small steps back and eventually stagger. Unconsciously, Winry quickly came up to him just as his back hit the wall. As saddening as he looked, Winry was grateful; she'd rather have his back against a wall than have him staggering on shaky legs. Then, however, she saw as he let the back of his head hit the very wall he was leaning on. Afterwards, the Alchemist slowly slid down until he was sitting on the ground, his flesh leg folded up while his Automail lay straight on the ground. His metallic arm sat on his lap while his flesh one was slightly stretched about his false limb.

The Rockbell mechanic was surprised at the look in his eyes; he looked dazed and lost, almost empty. Immediately, she fell to her knees before him and waited for him to speak. She didn't have to wait very long for, the moment she was eye-level with him, he did not move but spoke very softly.

"Why does it hurt so much, Winry?" he asked as he continued to stare at some invisible thing that was at the ceiling. What he said next confirmed Winry's question; what was causing his depression? "Why does it hurt so much to miss someone?" Now the question was, who did he miss? Was Al's leaving taking such a toll on him? Did he still miss his deceased mother from so long ago? Or…did Winry's supposed anger and rejection of his decision two years ago hurt him so badly? Did he miss _her?_

"What do you mean, Ed? Who do you miss?" Winry asked him while still sitting on her knees but leaning forward on her palms in intrigue. Ed's attention was finally caught as his eyes widened for a moment and then tensed. His head lowered from his previously undying gaze until he was staring down to his side again. He stayed silent, almost as if he were refusing to speak. Something's never changed and Winry supposed they never would.

She waited a few moments but Ed was still as stubborn as ever. It was clear in his face. She sighed sadly and her shoulders and eyes drooped. She figured the only way to get to him was hurt him. Although it made her heat ache, she mentally slapped herself for what she'd say to him next.

"If you have nothing to say," she mumbled silently as she looked back to him. "Then I have no reason to stay here." She began to stand up once more. However, in that moment, something in Ed's brain must have clicked because he jumped and grabbed the Rockbell's wrist, forcing her to kneel before him once more. She whined slightly at the pain of her knees meeting so harshly with the floor but, when she went to protest she was unable to do so. Her cerulean eyes were now locked with his rare golden ones as she felt his grip loosen slightly but his metallic fingers remained wrapped around her wrist.

His eyes; they were like windows into his everything. His past, his pain, his anger and hate, and even his hope; it was all so clear within the pools of molten gold that resided in his iris's. They were the definition of intoxicating and addicting; once you fell into the undying gaze of the young Alchemist, you couldn't get out, no matter how hard you tried. Winry was so lost that she had completely given up on talking; instead, she would just sit there and stare into him as if they were the only human beings left in the world. In her mind, they were.

The silence was broken, however, when Ed finally allowed his lips to move and words to be produced.

"Don't leave," was all he said; so subtle was his voice that Winry was almost sure that he hadn't spoken at all.

"Then tell me what's wrong," she said back to him gently, letting him know that she had no intention of hurting him at the moment. She heard him shrug and his grip intensified slightly, causing Winry to wince without a sound.

"I just…I…" it was as if he no longer knew any coherent words; they were all escaping and flying away like a small dove desperately trying to escape from the danger that was trying to injure it. However, this dove felt sympathy towards the Elric and flew back into his palms, just as long as he promised to be gentle. Words once again formed in his mind and he was able to speak. But, keeping his promise to the dove, his voice was soft and gentle. "I miss you."

Winry's eyes widened but then drooped sadly once more at his response. She looked down and thought for a few moments before making another move. She advanced towards the blonde, forcing her hand out of his grasp. He resisted slightly but, reluctantly, let go of her wrist, allowing his metal hand to fall upon his leg. He noticed, though, that her hands now snuck their way to his sides, at his hips. Again, for the umpteenth time that damn day, his eyes widened and looked up into the blue eyes that were staring back at him.

It was quiet for a few moments as the two simply stared into the other one's eyes. That changed when, suddenly, Winry laid her lower half between the Elric's legs and cuddled her upper body into his chest while burying her head under his chin. The Alchemist's eyes remained wide, he blushed a deep crimson at his cheeks and he swallowed a very large lump that had formed somewhere between staring into the mechanic's eyes and the transition of her kneeling to her laying on him. His body was very unsure of what movements to make, as was he. Then Winry said something that surprised him greatly.

"I'm so sorry, Ed." Those four simple words caused the Elric to be surprised but then relax nervously.

"Why?" he asked quietly. "You shouldn't be sorry for anything; I'm the one who left you so many times and then decided to leave again...what could _you_ be sorry for?" he asked. The tone in his voice had not changed since the last time he had spoken; the only difference was that, now, he spoke a tad bit more loudly.

"I'm sorry I hurt you so much…I'm sorry I caused you even more pain…I'm sorry if it felt like I had rejected your decision." She was trying so hard to fight back the tears in her eyes that wanted to escape. She forced them back and continued. "I should've been happy for you; you're risking your life every now and then just to save a life…just for that, I owe you this apology." The only word that could describe Edward at the moment was speechlessness; words, once again, escaped him. Then he remembered something; confession was good for the soul.

With anxious, shaky hands, he wrapped his arms around the young woman's small waist, blushing further and awaiting something from Winry. When he was certain that she wouldn't speak, he continued after sighing to himself.

"Winry?" he mumbled, his voice matching the actions of his hands.

"Yeah, Ed?" the blonde mechanic replied quietly a she held the golden-blonde tighter around his waist.

"For starters…I accept your apology; I'm happy to see that you don't hate me anymore…" his grip around her became tighter but Winry kneeled up and came up to his eye-level once more.

"I didn't hate you," she told him as she, once again, brushed away strands of hair that were in front of his eyes. "I was just upset…I was wrong to do what I did to you and, again, I'm sorry for that…" she looked away from him sadly, her shoulders drooping dejectedly. "I'm just surprised _you_ don't hate _me_ for that." This certainly brought intrigue in Ed. He sat up and leaned forward so that his flesh leg was folded up but behind Winry's back and his Automail leg was folded that leg. His metal hand was hanging onto his flesh leg's knee while his other one was free.

"Winry," he said, causing the other blonde to look up into his eyes. "After two years of missing you and thinking I was never going to see you again…how could you possibly think I could hate you?" he asked her. Unconsciously, his real hand slipped onto her face and cupped her cheek. Winry's eyes fell half-lidded, as did Ed's after a few moments. His warm hand remained in its place but their faces were inching closer together. Eventually, they had no choice but to let their lips connect and close their eyes.

And so began their first kiss. Ed slipped his other hand onto the young woman's cheek and Winry responded by slipping her hands onto his chest and then sliding them up and around his neck. Immediately giving the other permission to come into each other, the kiss intensified deeply. It was so loving and burning with passion; long, overdue love and passion that each was grateful to be expressing. They finally pulled away gently after they felt their lungs begging for breath.

Their eyes stayed locked as their breath was heavy. It could only stay silent for so long.

"I love you," Edward suddenly breathed, refusing to take his gaze away from the ocean-blue orbs staring into his gold ones. Winry gave him a gentle, lopsided smile and replied.

"I love you too, Ed."

* * *

F--M--A

* * *

The next morning would find the two blondes cuddled together against the wall they had been near the night before. Edward was leaning on his back while a sleeping Winry lay on his chest with her arms folded and laying upon the elder Elric's chest while his own arms were wrapped, protectively, around her small waist. Neither had anymore worries and that was something to be happy about. Which they were; a closer look would show that the two were sharing small, almost unnoticeable, smiles on their lips. A smile; something the two had practically been faking for along while until now.

They would awake soon; Winry would say she had to attend to her work while Ed was beg her to stay, saying that missing only one day wouldn't kill her. After a bit of playful arguing and protesting, she would fall under the intoxicating spell of his strong golden eyes and his eager-to-explore lips and tongue. Ed would win the victory and he'd spend the rest of the day holding her as she cooked breakfast and relaxing and going shopping with her, also playing hooky along with her.

* * *

F--M--A

* * *

**A/N: **OMG .-. this has taken _way_ too long DX I'm sorry for the long update XP but, I got it up, _finally!! _DX Please R&R, constructive criticism, no flames ;) thanks!

_This story is_** complete! **X3


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